Did I really lose my child? Did I lose sight of motherhood? Did I forget how precious my babies are to me? Sometimes the answer is yes. The sparkly gadgets that call away our attention, needing to feed, wash, tidy up and all the other million chores that go together to keep a family running. Focusing on being ahead rather than being present. And so when Tiny T whined all weekend of a sore tummy and she had a slight fever, I had NO idea that she had a grumbly appendix which was going to burst on us. Burst on us good and proper - emergency surgery at 4am and 10 days in hospital (and still there).
My little angel.
Don't leave me.
And you didn't. But has this made me a perfect mum, am I always attentive to your needs or do I still struggle to balance life, motherhood, love and myself? Of course I do. I am exhausted, like your dad, after spending all this time watching you recover in hospital but I wouldn't leave your side or leave you alone for a minute. You are so fragile, so perfect, so adorable, so whiney, so contrary and someone I am so completely in love with. A beautiful child and one I hope I can watch grow into a beautiful, loved woman.
Thank goodness for grandma, helping us take care of K and you.
Please come home soon
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